Come look into the mind of Agent Wraith; a seer of sorts, a jack-of-all-trades, an incorporeal being. You will see his thoughts on humanity, the future, and his undeniable urge to interfere. No humans were harmed in the making of this page.
"In the summer of 2005, the American Association of Retired Persons (AARP) hosted asmoke-in to promote the legalization of marijuana. Celebrities that participated: Willie Nelson, Woody Harrelson (obvs), Bette Midler, Santana, Chicago, David Crosby and Graham Nash, Rod Stewart, The New Jefferson Starship, Tony Orlando, Ringo Starr, Tommy Chong, Snoop Dogg, and Robert Downey Jr."
If you didn't know Snoop Dogg smoked weed, you need to crawl back under the lichen covered rock you rolled yourself out from underneath and never come back out. Sure, celebrities doing 'drugs' is not some new thing. Given.
But.. I bet some would be surprised to find out that more people do than originally thought (by these stuffy, stuffy persons). In fact, I could wager more than half the people you saw today 'partakes' in some form or fashion. And by 'partake', I mean weed. Cannabis.
I'm not going to preach about it. You're smart. Look at the facts you will find yourself not digging that hard to.. Ugh, I have to remember to not smoke before posting..
Anyways.
Aside from slight memory loss, there's not much else to it. Some giggling. Strange fascination with your own hands. You even might get the idea to put together this crappy internet 'Night Show'..
I should probably have thought this one out a little better.
You do not want to fuck with the drug cartels down here.
For reals.
Unless you can eat 7.62 and piss concertina wire, you're best bet is to keep your damn mouth shut, keep your eyes to the ground, and (preferably) both feet on the gas.
Gangs' favored method of communication to the police (and other gangs) is to leave messages.
On dead bodies.
Dropped at security agencies.
The Zetas and Knights Templar are kickin up some serious dust, but there are lesser know who are scrambling for power and money that comes with it. Gulf cartels, from Northern Mexico and even Florida, are getting in on the action, forcing federal involvement.
As it should.
If you are brazen enough to shoot agents in the face with AK-47s, you should know you are turning the heat waaaaaaay the fuck up.
Here's a scandal bigger than Copyright Infringement or Watergate:
The guy in the middle is known as 'El Brad Pitt'.
He got picked up in Chihuahua on Thursday.
Thanks Associated Press for helping me maintain my facade!
-Agent Wraith
p.s. This shit actually happens all the time..
IN JERSEY!
Seriously. Don't let me depress you.
Here, have some douche:
Do you see that nifty digital picture at the top of this page?
Yeah, that's me:
"good ole mast.." ..er, Agent Wraith.
It was an exercise in portents.
And it seems the 'prediction' has come true.
I have found myself under watchful eye before, whether malicious or 'just for lulz', and remained unscathed.
This time, eh.. not so much.
I've talked about Facebook 'hackers' being successful in infiltrating the systems here at Los Sauces.
There were executions, treaties, terminations, and compromises made to eliminate this as a threat.
Just recently we had some 'disturbance' by a certain 'RLSH'.. one who practices in IP identification.
This is all fine and dandy. I never do anything without at least one camera recording (see: SLENDERMAN) and have it documented. Why? Well, just so I can't be called a liar. I'm sure it would be easy to just dump my claims.. but why bother? There were 3 people in that room to start.
Someone invited a fourth.
That fourth pulled a location 'out of a hat'.
Called me a.. what was that choice piece of wording you used?
'YOU LYING FUCK!'
Heroes.
So what if I lie?
You gonna spank me?
I'd prefer if you would leave my punishment to professionals, like 22.
But on topic, you really have nothing to gain from it.
Spanking or revealing my location.
Whether or not I live in New Jersey... does it really matter?
No one seriously believed I lived in Mexico, did they?
I mean, was there anyone out there who thought I was anything more than a 'roleplayer in his mother's basement'?
What was that guy's name?
DoomCircle?
Seriously though, all you are doing is making yourself look bad.
That is the point though, isn't it?
Reveal yourself to be a plebe.
Show your snitchy colors.
And on a lighter note:
I'm actually a really good shot with a long bow.
I thought I was kinda okay.. but I'm actually really good.
Amazing what a few hours away from the computer will do ya.
You should try it.
-Agent Wraith
p.s. Don't think I forget.
I call you a bitch.. because you act like one.
