(Another) Identity Crisis

aka Just How Many God Damned Identities Do You Have?


Greetings!  I am Agent Wraith, you're not.
I say this both to identify myself and you, dear reader.
There are folks out there (both in and out of the internets, little droogs) who disguise who they are.
They use masks, metaphorically and literally, to conceal their true nature; their identities.

I've heard the gossip, ladies and gentlemen.  I may seem like a small being (though, somehow FAT), but I have certain strengths and resources that get me into all sorts of mischief.  One of them, I will reveal:
AT&T.  This only goes so far, mind you.  There has to be communication to eavesdrop on.
You are paying attention, aren't you?  Don't take anything I say personal.

Hypothesis:
I have kept your 'faith' in me, dear reader, because-
1. I'm not a threat.
2. I keep secrets (yours and mine).
3. I don't want the alienation that would result from my 'betrayals'.

I have a 'secret' identity.
What's this 'secret'?
It's not so secret.
A handful of villains know who I am.  IRL.
One, in particular, knows me VERY well.
I am glad for this.  This villain is FEARED, even by me.

There is ONE hero (that I know of) who has seen my face.
One.
This is okay too.  She has proven to me to be upstanding and ruthless.
Both good (evil) qualities for villains.
And we trust each other (to an extent).

Now, I know you're reading this and might be thinking, "AW, are you playing another Mind Game?  How are we to believe anything you say?"
Well, you can't.  Even if I wasn't painstakingly cryptic, you still couldn't trust me.
This is the internet.
I could be a 600 lb MotoCross enthusiast with a penchant for grease paint or a pasty patsy whose hair will never grow in because I keep pulling it out.  What you have seen, you might not have seen.  You get me?

Aside from that, there are people out there who have created for themselves all manner of identities for all manner of reasons.  There is always going to be people who not only play 'both sides of the fence', but live on 'both sides of the fence'.  It's part of life now.  This is the game.

So, before I get any more long-winded, I want to break down some of the more amusing rumors I've heard lately.  Gossip, it's always entertaining.  If not nihilistic.

1.  I am (insert hero name here).
This is utterly laughable.  Now, were I a hero, this is how I would respond to throw off any suspicion.  I am Agent Wraith. No one else.
2.  I am Henchman 22.
This is a half-truth.  I will admit I have loomed over shoulders, directed hands, even full-on possessed 22 while she was on Facebook.  22 says hello.  We are two entities, mind you.
3. I am (insert villain name here).
Oh, do I wish.  Now, were I another villain, this is how I would respond to throw off any suspicion.  I am Agent Wraith.  Baron Terror is the only other villain who visits Los Sauces in person.  I've had other villains visit ethereally, electronically, and audially.
Had very nice chats.
4. I live in New Jersey.
Those who need to know, know the truth.  That is all.
5. I live in Deer Park, MI.
I don't know HOW that happened. lol I -did- live there once.  If you can call it living.  There were no deer; it was no walk in the park.
6.  I'm Charlie Sheen.
Give me a break.
7. I live with my mother.
Actually, this one is 100% true.

Have your identities.

Play Mind Games.

Tonight! Around 11-ish, we'll begin.
Hmm?  Talkshoe.  There was once this nifty gadget/widget/embedded player/link thing on the right-hand side of this electric document. You can find the direct link to the show.
It's already happened, I see.

No.  Literally.
I see.

Win fabulous prizes*!



Agent Wraith
p.s. I told you about The Dreaded Eye Poke.  Seriously.  I know why no one is paying attention.
And why I won't be privy to any more secrets.









*Prizes include:  xenophobia, Destruction, truth, shame, victory, and respect